Monday, December 25, 2006

Wilderness

So I'm pondering this wilderness/night season. I'm realizing that there is much more about this in scripture than I ever noticed before. So my thoughts are overflowing...for example, how did John the Baptist learn to have joy in the wilderness? How did the Beloved in Song of Songs get to the point where she could state in confidence "I am my beloved's and His desire is for me." How did she get to the point where she could welcome the night season?! How did Job get to the point where he could say "Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him?" I am so not there yet but I want to be. I don't know that it would make this night season any easier on me but I want it to be worthwhile...in other words, I want to learn what I am supposed to be learning in this night season. I wish I understood His ways. I want to understand His ways! I want to know what it is He is doing in me during this season. I guess I'll see the end result and hopefully then I'll get it to some degree. He doesn't seem to be acting much like a lover right now. He's just gone. I feel like my soul is in Sheol. I'm holding to promises right now...I'm holding fast...I need faith. Lots of it!

I think the more I read Psalm 16 the more I realize that this should be my life psalm. I'm clinging to verses 7-11.

Psalm 16 (Amplified Bible - Thank you, Holly! I love you!)

A Poem of David; [probably] intended to record memorable thoughts.
1KEEP and protect me, O God, for in You I have found refuge, and in You do I put my trust and hide myself.

2I say to the Lord, You are my Lord; I have no good beside or beyond You.

3As for the godly (the saints) who are in the land, they are the excellent, the noble, and the glorious, in whom is all my delight.

4Their sorrows shall be multiplied who choose another god; their drink offerings of blood will I not offer or take their names upon my lips.

5The Lord is my chosen and assigned portion, my cup; You hold and maintain my lot.

6The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; yes, I have a good heritage.

7I will bless the Lord, Who has given me counsel; yes, my heart instructs me in the night seasons.

8I have set the Lord continually before me; because He is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.

9Therefore my heart is glad and my glory [my inner self] rejoices; my body too shall rest and confidently dwell in safety (hope),

10For You will not abandon me to Sheol (the place of the dead), neither will You suffer Your holy one [Holy One] to see corruption.

11You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.

2 comments:

Tamara said...

Rachel, you are in my prayers and thoughts. I can't wait to see the En Gedi in your desert. I hope One Thing knocks you off your feet. I will be home tonight later. I miss you already!

Joshy said...

Hey! I have a hatred and love for the night season/desert. I hate it because it sucks! It is uncomfortable nothing is easy, nothing comes quickly, and nothing is obvious. I love it for one reason. It is absolute proof of the real love that Jesus has for me. It is a tangible reality of His desire for more of my heart. He takes me here to get more of me. He takes me here to focus my heart on Him and help me leave all my other lovers behind.
When I realize that joy is found in the desert, not because I like the desert but because I know who took me there, and I know why!