Enough is enough

I'm not satisfied with just sitting in His temple without hearing His voice. Yet in my flesh I give up too quickly. I fall asleep in His temple as I wait wishing He would speak to me. I fast hoping I would hear Him. But instead I feel like my heart shrinks instead of being enlarged. He may be speaking but I hear nothing. The Word is dry and lifeless to my parched lips. I have trouble even praying aloud. I try to praise and my tongue is barren. I try to command my soul and end up fighting my flesh instead of ministering to the Lord. Maybe I just need to be satisfied with sitting in His temple and giving Him a joyless heart filled with dry, lifeless praise and just thank Him for being God and being good. I know He is good and gives good gifts to His children I guess sometimes I either give up to fast or He just isn't planning on bestowing such gifts until eternity. I am tired of sitting in the prayer room with nothing to sing, nothing to pray, and trying to meditate on His Word yet finding it dry. I don't want to give up but somedays I get sick of running in a hamster wheel and getting nowhere... Where is my En Gedi? Oh, Lord, I'm dying of thirst...